Friday, 5 January 2018

kuh und überkuh

Not content to limit their party’s ideology regarding eugenics to human beings, Reichsminister Hermann Göring (bedauerlicherweise, nür auf Deutsch) wanted to create a quarry worthy of the Nazis to hunt.
Inspired by historical accounts of the fearsome but unfortunately extinct aurochs—including encounters by a conquering General Julius Caesar—Göring worked with the husbandry experts, the Brothers Heck, who tried, through careful breeding, convinced that no animal’s bloodline truly disappears from the face of the Earth, scoured different types of wild and domesticated cows from all over the globe and selected for traits that they believed would reproduce the monstrous and formidable beast. The offspring of this experiment, the Heck cattle—sort of like The Boys from Brazil—were not the genetic heirs of the giant aurochs hunted to extinction in the seventeenth century but were perhaps close enough. The defeat of Germany prevented the project from coming to fruition but Göring planned to allow his Überkühe to roam in a wildlife reserve in an primordial forest in Poland—a Nazi Jurassic Park.