Thursday, 11 March 2021

fractured fairy-tales

McSweeney’s Internet Tendency contributor Tom Smyth excerpts segments from Oprah Winfrey’s other tell-all interviews with princesses. Below is a passage from her dialogue with a certain maiden in the tower. 

ᴏᴘʀᴀʜ: I think a lot people have this false perception of royalty. Can’t a process do whatever a princess wants to do? 

ʀᴀᴘᴜɴᴢᴇʟ: You have to understand, I couldn’t just get up and go. They took my passport and driver’s license, and when I would ask to do something like get lunch with my friends, Mother Gothel would say that it wasn’t a good idea, that I was too oversaturated in the press. And I would say, how could I be oversaturated? I haven’t left this tower in 18 years. 

More at the link up top.