the thracian

Acclaimed by the Praetorian Guard as emperor in the West on this day in 238—a year later labelled by history as the Year of the Six Emperors (see also)—and reluctantly confirmed by the Roman senate who did not find the prospect of putting an oafishly large barbarian bandit in charge, Gaius Julius Verus Maximinus “Thrax” would rule for three years, the first to attain such the pinnacle of government without coming from the elite classes of the Senātus or knights eques. Thrax’ tumultuous reign is considered to have set in motion the Crisis of the Third Century which eventually led to its downfall and dissolution in the West and ruled mainly from Mogontiacum, capital of Germania Superior along the Rhein and from the province of Israel, where there is archaeological evidence of starting on some infrastructure work with an unfinished roadway, never able to come to Rome herself. Paranoid and focused on consolidating power inciting accusations and cultivating a court of informers, Thrax doubled soldiers’ pay and waged continuous warfare—financing these policies through raising taxes and appropriation of church property and violent confiscations, earning almost universal distrust from those outside of the army and his inner circle. Marching on Rome in May of 238, Thrax was assassinated by his own troops at a camp outside the city walls at Aquileia, the gates closed to the advancing siege of the unpopular emperor by order of the senate, the soldiers disaffected and suffering from privation with taking the fortified city not as simple of a matter that they had been led to believe.

ᛟ

A vote on the crucial stimulus and relief package for the American people was pushed into the obscure and suspect early morning hours—with no shortage of dissenters pointing out this rank hypocrisy—though the statutory delay and eventual relenting was wholly due to the fact that the needed quorum had excused themselves in order to attend the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) in Orlando, Florida with not only an idol of Trump stealing the spotlight (we can understand how a movement might be bestowed its problematic golden calf) but the stage design and its flow a brash and ostensibly deliberate reference to that Elder Futhark rune called Odal, Ōðalan (ᛟ) opportunistically inferred to express inheritance, heritage, embraced by Nazis and Neo-Nazis, and is a reassertion in lightly veiled language of white supremacy. The serifs are a special touch, just to erase any doubt but even if by chance that this was ab unfortunately coincidence, it will be interrupted as outright to the far right who might detect weakness and hesitancy in their GOP cult. Not a single Republican House member voted in favour of a nearly two-trillion dollar recovery bill, which nonetheless passed with the Democrat‘s majority.

no vacancy

Whilst not the first time that the Grifter-in-Chief sought to capitalise on conspiracy theories with room rates at Trump’s DC hotel, the former Post Office Building, jumping to over five thousand dollars per night for single-occupancy just ahead of the certification of the US Electoral College vote interrupted by the violent insurrection, there’s one last desperate attempt to siphon money off these useful idiots the first week of March. With prices nearly tripled over the massively over-priced going rate, the suggestion is that the United States of American was secretly and incontrovertibly turned into a corporation in 1871 (occasioned by the passage of legislation that turned the country into an asset of the city of London) and that Ulysses S. Grant, inaugurated on 4 March 1869 was the last legitimate president. QAnon followers are dangling the prospect that Trump will be invested on this day as the nineteenth president, rather than the forty-fifth pretender, and the country will revert back to its original form, an argument to moot any subsequent legislation and render sovereign citizens immune to enforcement. Whether or not this date draws crowds, it’s assured that they will need to equivocate over their next rapture.

who cares!

Apparently using White House letterhead deprived his preferred mode of communication (see previously here and here), Citizen Trump to no effect and with zero geopolitical consequence has written to the Screen Actors’ Guild, the US labour union for film, television and radio performers as well as journalists, to pre-emptively resign once word circulated that the Guild would eject him for notorious behaviour, ill-betting a member of the organisation. In his signature immodest way—also used with a host of UN agencies and NATO partners—he rubbishes the union as doing very little for him whereas Trump has greatly helped “the cable news television business (said to be a dying platform with no much time left until I got involved in politics), and created thousands of jobs at networks such as MSDNC and Fake News CNN, among many others.” Despite parallel efforts to digitally remove his cameo appearances, Trump goes on to cite his roles in Zoolander, Home Alone 2, and Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps as well as reality television.

6x6

flotus: the story and legacy of the wooden Melania Trump sculpture in Slovenia 

lightening never strikes twice: a meteorologist debunks some weather myths 

we shall come rejoicing: digging out the sheep—rescued after a heavy snowfall  

photobomb: animals interrupting wildlife photographers 

draw a tattoo of a mailbox: in a reversal of sorts, compete with other human sketch artist to prove to an AI who is the most accomplished—via Waxy 

conspiracist ideation: what to do about QAnon

strange bedfellows

One could be excused for thinking that we were nearly done with Trump after his corporate donors had distanced themselves from that dumpster fire, but one rentier entrepreneur whose business acumen and ambition seems somehow complimentary—if not pandering—who we also thought it safe to assume would not be making an encore appearance, the MyPillow guy (see previously) has remained loyal and showed up at the White House on Friday to share some thoughts about declaring martial law, excerpted from his MyPillow Plan™ playbook thanks to a telephoto lens.

high crimes and misdemeanours

Yesterday, the House of Repre-sentatives, Democrat members joined by ten Republicans, voted to impeach Donald Trump for an unprecedented second time as a “constitutional remedy to ensure that the republic will be safe from this man, who is so resolutely determined to tear down the things that we hold dear and that hold us together” by his demonstrably dangerous and treasonous behaviour in encouraging a violent insurrection against Congress. The House undertook this course of action when the vice president and the cabinet refused to entertain invoking Amendment XXV to remove the Trump from office.

5x5

a public servant’s heart: Arnold Schwarzenegger’s message to America 

seven up: pioneering documentarian and ethnographer Michael Apted has passed away, aged seventy-nine 

der nacht der kurzen finger: fact-checking and myth-busting the deplatforming of Trump 

thought forms: revisiting a 1901 Theosophist “record of clairvoyant investigation” as a lens for art history—see also  

weeping in the promised land: a new song from John Fogerty speaks to our times

7x7

zip-tie guy: as bad as this act of terrorism was, the Ku Klux Coup (see previously) could have turned out much worse  

election, objection, ambition, sedition: another pitch-perfect Randy Rainbow political parody 

regrets only: Trump’s final missive confirming he would not be attending Joe Biden’s inauguration—cornerstone to a peaceful transition of power—is interpreted as another way of casting aspersions on a legitimate election and gets his account suspended from Twitter—permanently  

privilege check: race and the cos-play veneer of the invasion combined with remorse over more heavy-handed tactics over the summer allowed them to organise and launch their raid unchecked—see previously  

us capitol police: encomnia for officer killed protecting senators and congress members from the Blue Lives Matter crowd  

jericho march: more Cos-Play with Evangelical Christians (previously) rallying in D.C. blowing shofars

no pension, no secret security detail, no travel allowance, no chance to hold high office again: a second impeachment has consequences even a few days out and Congress is moving swiftly to make it happen, nearly as fast as Mr Rainbow above or Lego

rats, ships—you know the drill

Two of the few remaining long-time Trump Cabinet Officials, Secretaries of Education and Transportation Betsy DeVos and Elaine Chao (wife of Palpatine—previously, I look forward to having never to mention or think about these people again) found Trump’s role in encouraging violence and treason inflection points and have joined a dozen of other officials by resigning in protest, taking advantage seemingly on the radio silence imposed on Trump by social media. As calls for removal mounted, either by a second impeachment or the vice-president and the remaining Cabinet staff invoking Amendment XXV—addressing presidential succession and disability—to declare him unfit to govern, Trump reportedly has issued assurances for a peaceful transition of power but was otherwise quiet, preparing to award Presidential Medals of Freedom to three professional golfers, one posthumously. Senior security council members and the special envoy to Northern Ireland (former chief-of-staff) quit, possibly with many more to follow.

the thirty-seventh of december

Being quite chuffed with the results of the run-off elections in Georgia which takes control of the Senate out of the hands of the GOP under leadership of Kentucky Palpatine and making the chamber evenly split with Vice President Harris the deciding vote in case of a draw and just having finally watched a poignant, humorous send-off the past year with Death to 2020, seeing an armed mob of pro-Trump extremist storm the Capitol during the joint session of Congress to affirm the ballot results of the US Electoral College was a bit of whiplash. Incited by Trump’s urging a crowd of supporters to march on the legislator to oppose the certification process and reverse the results, the clashed with and overpowered police forces, four individuals dying during the violence, and broke into the chambers of the House and Senate. Representatives were evacuated but four hours later, the joint session was re-convened with Joe Biden and Kamala Harris declared victors in what is generally an anodyne and sedate formality—with objections and abstentions entertained in due process. Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, overseeing the process along who had her office ransacked by an insurgent said, “We know that we’re in difficult times but little could we have imagined the assault that was on our democracy today. To those who strove to deter us from our responsibility, you have failed.” Most challenges failed to garner a champion and the votes stood, with the joint session adjourning for Arizona and Pennsylvania with the separate chambers debating the objection for an allotted two hours. Legislative business will continue overnight and into the morning until all the votes are certified.

8x8

ruminant digestive process: whilst bovine flatulence makes the headlines, burps are the chief source of methane and could be neutralised with a special mouth guard—via the New Shelton Wet/Dry  

caporegime: via ibīdem, the Organised Crime and Corruption Reporting Project names Jair Bolsonaro Corrupt Person of the Year, trouncing with a narrow margin Trump, Erdoğan and Netanyahu  

commander-in-cheat: First Minister Nicola Sturgeon won’t allow Trump to visit his golf course in Scotland during the pandemic lockdown to bow out of attending the inauguration in Washington, DC 

georgia on my mind: Reverend Warnock declared winner in Senate race and Democrats poised to take control of the Upper House  

grogu pains: The Mandalorian reimaged as 1990s sitcom  

die abenteur des prizen achmed: the incredible silhouette animation technique of Lotte Reiniger—more here  

population density: housing ten billion humans in one mega city could help vastly reduce our footprint, freeing up the remaining land mass for rewilding and argiculture 

all the trimmings: for this traditional day of ceremonially discarding the tree, ways to transform it into garnish and a tasty treat

i just want to find eleven-thousand seven hundred and eighty votes

In an extraordinary hour-long phone call over the weekend reminiscent of Trump’s earlier attempt to persuade the Ukrainian government to smear his political opponent with defamatory material discovered or manufactured regarding his son, Trump pressured the Georgian secretary of state to apply a new calculus to their method for tabulating the vote and overturn the narrow but solid and multiple times reconfirmed win for Joe Biden whose ticket carried the state. This behaviour, inappropriate and contemptible, is a low point in American democracy and warrants a second impeachment before Trump sets a new nadir.

the seditious dozen

A group of Republican senators and senators-elect with the backing of the vice-president have announced plans to reject electors from states that are considered “suspect” for having voted wrongly—unless Congress commits to creating a commission to investigate their baseless claims of voter fraud.

Having failed to achieve any the desired outcome in the court system full of judges appointed by the Trump administration, the incumbents seem to hope that this treasonous band of sycophants can delay, belay the inevitable. In a normally anodyne ceremony, the senate convenes to ratify the ballots of the Electoral College on 6 January. The senate, which voted to acquit Trump of high crimes and misdemeanours after the House impeached him, feels that this dopey cos-play coup will likely fail because of Democrat control of congress and the likelihood of the GOP losing their thin majority of senate seats as well in the Georgia run-off election.

7x7

3 a.m. eternal: the musical stylings of the KLF are finally available for streaming services—via Things Magazine  

paleofutures: the lunar Western Moon Zero Two takes place in 2021  

no show: Trump fails to appear at his Mar-a-Lago New Year’s Eve bash—guests entertained by Rudy Giuliani and Vanilla Ice 

not disappoint: a recommendation for a good polyglotinous language lover to follow, whose byline does rather suggest a crash blossom  

star wars—give me those star wars, nothing but star wars: the saga continues  

alla breve or cut for time: big, brute data analysis may finally resolve the controversy over Beethoven’s metronome and how the composer intended his works to be heard—via Strange Company

klanglandschaft: Swiss artist Zimoun engineers ambient soundscapes with everyday materials

8x8

persons of the year: more Year End lists from Miss Cellania—see previously  

75x75: seventy-five superlative photographs captured by as many photographers  

mys: the Swedish word without an exact translation compliments hygge when it comes to coping with the prospect of a long, dark winter  

benedict donald: more fine art work (see also)—suitable for framing  

the twenty most powerless: the disenfranchised and estranged of the art world 

she said see you later, boy: McSweeney‘s most read monologues, vignettes and confessionals of 2020  

dance, dance revolution: a dance number from a trio of Boston Dynamics robots—see previously  

refreshing your feed: fifty superlative podcasts according to The Atlantic—via Super Punch

house music

Carroll Righter (*1900 – †1988), celebrity astrologer and horoscope columnist from the early 1940s onward and advisor to Ronald and Nancy Reagan, released a series of albums in 1969 with each record dedicated to a different zodiacal sign (see also), promising that the instrumental arrangements were especially attuned to one’s personality and constitution and will help alleviate everyday problems and help one to overcome challenges. More to explore at Weird Universe at the link up top.

8x8

the santaland diaries: a holiday classic from David Sedaris 

by jove: more on the complex system of Jupiter and its moons—including Valetudo, which crosses between the prograde and retrograde orbitals—see previously  

mimicry and mutualism: the monkey slug caterpillar (Phobetron pithecium, the larva of the hag moth) that evolved to resemble a tarantula  

where do i begin: Erich Segal’s Love Story at fifty

posse commmutatus: a fresh tranche of pardons (previously) from the outgoing and impeached Trump is an assault and insult on justice 

tree fm: for those who can’t readily go forest bathing or hug a perennial friend, tune into the soundscape of woods around the world—via Things Magazine  

pork-barrel politics: Trump frames riders in COVID aid bill as disgraceful after seven months of contentious negotiation, demands revision 

suggested serving: wintry cocktail and hot toddy recipes from eastern Europe

7x7

mercury rising: surveying the lasting damage that the hottest year on record has brought  

guardians of the galaxy: Space Force (previously) service members receive a new title  

deluxe apartment in the sky: artist granted viewing of exclusive properties on Billionaires’ Row in Manhattan 

lp: a playlist of James Baldwin’s record collection  

🌊: the Great Wave off Kanagawa in Lego form 

 lassen sie mich also sagen, dass dies ernst ist—bitte nehmen sie das auch ernst: Angela Merkel’s March address and appeal on coronavirus lauded as Speech of the Year 

 heat gap: climatic gentrification across city districts leads to worse outcomes for the poorest residents

great aspostasy

Suspending the fact for a moment (which the author, a lapsed rapture-ready individual himself owes to straightaway) that much like malleability of horoscopes, prophesies about the End of Days can and have been applied to countless leaders, charismatic and otherwise, this analysis, coming to us by way of the illustrious Mx van Hoorn’s cabinet of hypertext curiosities—updated but not all the way up to the present and his loss reaffirmed in the courts and his minions rioting and rallying to overturn the outcome—and supposition whether American evangelicals might even be able to recognise the Anti-Christ were he to show up is an interesting one. 

Point for point, verse by verse the Trump administration is subjected to the predictions and again keeping in mind the caveats above and by the end, the correspondence is a bit unsettling—suggesting that they are following some ordained protocol, one which is arguably canon rather than fandom.  Insofar as God does not care to be dragged into this, it echoes the passage of the Grand Inquisitor from The Brothers Karamozov when Jesus returns to Seville during the Spanish Inquisition and is told in his cell prior to execution that he is no longer needed as the world is getting along fine without him.